"In my life there was too little of something that should have been there"
People are resourceful and resilient. Yet everyone needs safety and unconditional love. It requires a sense of security and caring guidance to be able to experience and express feelings. This might have been lacking in the past. Without such a base, and its resulting attachment to important others early in life, negative, mixed, as well as positive feelings can become harder to access in adulthood. Often resulting in over-reliance on ‘tricks’ to deal with daily life. Such tricks (or better: ‘defenses’) have been great aids to deal with adversity so far, but you may seek to address them to be able to move on.
“I experienced too much of something that should not have been there”
Fundamental assumptions of a good and meaningful world, and of a positive and worthy self, are essential. Yet they can be shattered by events too extreme, unpredictable, and uncontrollable to handle. Such stressful life events can be traumatizing for everyone, and the responses to such events are often very normal, understandable, and predictable. Unfortunately not always as adept to the demands of everyday life. They may inhibit enjoyment of living a carefree life in the company of loved ones and with attention to hobbies, work, and the self. Leaving you with all kinds of complaints, and your job, relationship, and health may suffer as a consequence. You may seek to address them to be able to move on.
“I don’t want to be labeled”
Roger Holmes upholds a trauma-informed and active stance in therapy. This means it is not the aim to diagnose and treat mental illness. Instead, while enjoying a coffee or tea, we explore psychological responses to interventions to assess and support inner health. Many such responses are logically related to what has happened in the present or earlier.
Sometimes it's simply a good thing to open up to someone, because the contact between people can shape a story in unexpected ways; influenced by eye contact, personal factors, emotions and the environment. Training in ISTDP*, and attention to the physical impact of chronic stress help me to help you unlock and unstuck. All in all, it’s not the goal to relive memories and losses, but to replace each resulting symptom with something healthy. After our first meeting, I will give a recommendation for follow-up aimed to fit your needs.
Differentiate between feelings, anxiety, and defenses
Recognize and regulate anxiety so as to bear painful affects
Recognize internal emotional impulses and their external triggers
Contact me for more information and options.
*Intensive Short-Term Dynamic Psychotherapy, a method of therapy that doesn’t let you get away with your defenses against feeling. In a firm yet compassionate manner, you will learn to identify the physiological experience of emotions, name them, and identify their impulse. Roger Holmes is in core training at the Bristol based ISTDP-UK training institute.
Background and experience
In 2006, I obtained a university degree (Master of Science) in Clinical Health Psychology. For over a decade I've been working at a large international corporation in various roles, ranging from lifestyle coach in a start-up, to trainer and manager of international teams of coaches. I worked as senior marketing manager for coaching solutions, and later as a senior researcher. I contributed to ‘Improving people’s lives by delivering meaningful innovation’. The type of solutions I looked into were typically related to health behavior promotion and support via a combination of hardware to measure, software to monitor, and e-coaching to motivate. I focused on improvement of general health-related behaviors as well as specific solutions for mental health. Stress measurements, and attention to relaxation and recovery were frequently elements of such solutions. In 2016, I opened "Praktijk voor goede gesprekken", initially in addition to my fulltime position. By 2021 I am more fully dedicating myself to providing mental health care and therapy.
At the base of these trajectories are, of course, many more experiences from personal as well as professional format. For the latter, feel free to check linked-in, for the former: feel free to ask. If appropriate and beneficial to the conversation I do not mind sharing such information.
Easy access: Centrally located at Flight Forum near Eindhoven Airport the practice is easily accessible by bicycle from Veldhoven and northern Eindhoven, or by car and public transport from beyond. Free parking available.
Estimated time between first contact and first appointment: 0-5 weeks (last updated January 2021)
Flexible: appointment options all week, including evenings and weekends.
Professional: I am registered with the Dutch Psychological Association (NIP) and the Belgian Commission des Psychologues and abide to their code of conduct. At the ISTDP-UK institute I participate in supervised core-training to advance my expertise and capabilities as a therapist.
International: good conversations are very personal and culturally sensitive. Sometimes all it takes to convey thoughts and feelings is a few words in your native language; and sometimes conversing in Dutch simply isn't possible. I offer my services in Dutch, English, and German. If your native language is French, Spanish or Italian we can also switch back and forth to your language if that is required.
Affordable: during office hours, a 25 euro starting fee plus a one twenty-five (1.25) per minute fee apply. Furthermore additional charges will apply for sessions outside of the practice, like home visits within 15km region (15.-) as well as a fee for evening or weekend time slots (20.-). All prices are in euro and excluding taxes. Contact me for more information, company tariffs, and my 'pay-it-forward' type pro-alio options.
Online: If you are unable to visit, we could meet online: from anywhere in the world. Safely via doxy (doxy.me/coffeeteapsy).
ContactAddress for sessions: Flight Forum 3508, Eindhoven (only by appointment)